Wait, is that toy... hitting on me?

Spotted in the Slope on 11th Street and 8th Ave:

"Hey girl - you pick up toys often?"

I really like this toy abandoner's style - a little flirtation can go a long way, right?

Repeat Offender! For the Love of Stuffed Animals!

Spotted in the Slope on 6th Ave and 9th Street:

At least this little guy is well equipped to self-soothe by rocking himself back and forth...

If the background surrounding this elephant looks familiar, it should: these are the same folks behind Pooh Bear's tragic demise, reported by ATIB back in August.

What is with these monsters?  More specifically: what do they have against stuffed animals?

Oy vey

To set the stage: This past weekend, my better half and I were walking in the Slope when I spotted a series of abandoned toys up the block.  While I was photographing some of the toys, Mr. Abandoned Toys wandered ahead, at which point I heard him say say "Wait, is this one... Jewish?!?"

Indeed - spotted in the Slope on 10th Street and 6th Ave (and just in time for Rosh Hashanah!):

Wait - what do we have here?

OMG (Old Testament) - It's Mitzvah Bear!

I have so many unanswered questions:

1. Why is there a blue stool taped to Elmo's left paw?

2. Why are Mitzvah Bear and Elmo holding paws?  Did we catch Mitzvah Bear in the midst of performing a mitzvah on Elmo?  Or is he trying to convert Elmo?  Or... is Elmo Jewish already?

3. This one is a bit esoteric, but how does abandoning the Mitzvah Bear correlate with the concept of a mitzvah generally?

Religion is SO COMPLICATED sometimes.

Someone's not an Elmo fan

Today's post comes via the talented voice behind Nom Nom Emporium, who spotted what is clearly the aftermath of a brat attack on the Northwest Corner of Union and Court Streets:

Perfect caption, as suggested by our tipster: "Mackenzie really wanted a pony for her 7th birthday..."

Dude is barely out of the birthday wrapping paper - I mean, COME ON!

According to our tipster, this scene also represented a strange instance of life immitating art, as she herself was abruptly dumped by a new beau the day after snapping this photo.

Coincidence?  I think not.  Elmo knows all, fair readers - by smiling through what is clearly every toy's worst nightmare, he teaches us that when life kicks you in the shins, be happy that you at least have a trash bin to lean up against.  Hmmm - not quite the insightful parable I was looking for - but you know what I'm getting at.

There are no honey pots where you're going, buddy...

Spotted in the Slope on 6th Ave and 9th Street:

Brave little guy - be strong, Pooh, be strong...

Just because his name is Pooh does not mean that he should be treated like a piece of crap.

A Victim of Fowl Play

Today's post comes courtesy of reader Danielle, who spotted the below critter on East 5th Street and 2nd Ave in Manhattan:

Poor poultry - killed on the mean streets of NY, like so many country birds that come to the big City with dreams of fame and fortune...

It's sad but true - before being carelessly discarded, it appears that this rooster had his wings bound and was strangled with a seat belt.  I don't know whether to call the sanitation department, the police, or the ASPCA.

(Kiddie) Pool Shark

Spotted in Carroll Gardens on Sackett Street and Court Street:

RIP: Taken in his prime...

If you live in NY, then unless you are a total hermit with central air, you know that we are in the midst of an oppressive heat wave.  The kind of heat wave where you prance around your apartment in your undies, linger as a long as possible in front of the open refrigerator, and sleep with absolutely zero bedding around you (even the thought of sheets is beyond abhorrent).

Which makes me ask the following question: WHY?  Why dump the kiddie pool now?!?  I'm not too proud to admit it - if I owned that pool, I would fill it with ice water and totally bask on the sidewalk.  No kiddies would be allowed, either (because I'm cranky when it's hot).